I've been to the toilet 11 times today. Now I don't know what normal is but I'm pretty sure that's not it.
To give you an idea of how I've arrived at this point, I'd had a pint of water , a mug of green tea and an omelette all before I had arrived at my desk at 8am – feeling sick, yes; feeling bloated, you bet; desperate for wee number three, absolutely.
I'm drinking water like a major drought is about to hit East Surrey. Why? Because today was the first day of bootcamp diet – and my has it been a day of highs and lows. I swear my tongue is about to disown me. It's been going from one rubbish taste sensation to another I'm not sure how much more it wants to take. First there was liquorice tea last night. This might be one of the weirdest things I've ever tasted. It smells like grass but it has a sweet aftertaste that clings to the back of your tongue. I stuck out my tongue like a six-year-old half expecting it to have changed colour. No such joy. Then it was on to cinnamon tea this morning – I have never tasted a worse drink. It tasted like I was drinking an air freshener! And finally onto ginger tea – who knew ginger tea could hurt the back of your throat?!
So to put the diet into some context, on Sunday I ate: a bowl of Cheerios (I was staying in a caravan with a friend who has children), a muffin, two chocolate fingers, two Cadbury Caramel biscuits, two mini chocolate muffins, a roast dinner complete with roast potatoes and Yorkshire puddings, a slice of peach tart, cheese on toast, a slice of cake (OK, two) and a couple of pieces of chocolate. It sort of felt like the Last Supper so you could say I was making the most of it.
Today I have eaten: an omelette, a tuna and egg salad with mushrooms, an apple, a handful of blueberries and almonds, a cod fillet, a bunch of kale and 11 asparagus. All washed down with about three litres of flavoured tea and tap water.
So that's day one of the diet done and a second exercise class complete with Total Body Fitness (this time on Kenley Airfield). I'm tired, headachy and really fancy a cuppa and a biscuit. Hopefully the cravings will stop soon! Finally, things I've learned since day one:
1. Not to put spinach in the microwave for three minutes. I managed to set fire to my dish – proper flames and everything!
2. I like almonds – I never knew this until today
3. That I can hard boil an egg - yes, I really had never done this before last night.
4. That exercising outdoors while the sun goes down actually feels a little bit special (thank you bootcamp boss Lindsay Gillam)Proudest moment:
Saying know to Jaffa Cakes when they were handed round by a colleague this afternoon.
Time for some sleep now.
