"MANNERS maketh man." Or so the adage goes. But, it appears, manners are no longer the preserve of just one sex, or even one class.
This was the lesson at the heart of a special lecture given to students at Royal Alexandra and Albert School.
Fearing the prevalence of "text speak" – which uses as few words or characters as possible – was causing young people to forgo traditional niceties such as "please" and "thank you", two teachers set out to bring back social etiquette.
Deputy head of sixth form, Sam Shaw, and Jonathan Gayner, a computing and ICT teacher, gave a presentation on modern manners to sixth formers at the school in Rocky Lane, Reigate.
Mr Shaw, who dresses for work each day in a three-piece suit often adorned with a carnation or pocket square, began the presentation: "Manners are not the preserve of the upper classes. Manners are for all, for each and every one of you."
Speaking afterwards, he told the Mirror: "We have begun to notice some students – and we put it down to text speak – were beginning to be very brief in e-mails, leaving out simple things like 'please' and 'thank you'.
"When you pull them up on it they look at you with confusion, as if to say 'I was being clear'."
Mr Shaw says the problems are particularly noticeable in e-mails as brevity can come across as rudeness.
He cited one example where an e-mail from a student to a teacher had simply read "Send me my coursework pictures."
Examples of such e-mails read out to students elicited both laughter and shock from the audience. But the basic principle of manners goes beyond electronic communications.
"Saying thank you and please, holding doors open for others, not being too demanding, not complaining too much, not dominating conversation, having civilised table manners, all of these are basic things that all of our students know, but sometimes need to be gently reminded about," Mr Shaw said.
"Manners have changed, it is not about knowing the right cutlery to use in a situation and manners are not a way of telling different classes of people apart.
"It is about giving a good impression, being respectable and being polite."
Mr Shaw said the presentation was given to sixth-form students to help them set a good example for younger students.
Elizabeth Leadbetter, a Year 13 student, said: "The presentation was very good. Sometimes we don't give much thought to manners, and even less to how we write e-mails, so this was a good recap."
Fellow student Antonia Johnstone added: "My uncle just wrote me a long e-mail about not saying thank you. I didn't realise it meant so much, but it does.
"People expect you to behave in a certain way and, if you don't, their perception of you can change."
